02/23/2005: "Has my blog turned me into an insecure whore for comments?"
I felt confident about the painting I posted last night but then I kept checking back during the day to see if anyone had commented on it and no one had (which isn't unusual by the way) but it made me start to worry that the piece sucked...and the more time went by without a single email or post about it, the more convinced I became that the piece was total rubbish and that people had seen it but not said anything out of embarrassment for me.
The piece didn't change but my perception of it sure did...and based solely on the fact that I posted it here and no one said anything. How pathetic is that? I never used to take much stock in having my work accepted and it made me wonder if this blog is having a positive or negative affect on my creative process. I wonder if other artists (writers, musicians etc.) with blogs confront similar bouts of insecurity when they post new work and hear only the crickets.
Don't get me wrong, I *love* being able to get feedback etc. but I can't help feeling it's become a crutch...using it as a way to seek validation. That should be coming from within... no? At least when you exhibit work in a gallery, youíre presenting finished pieces. Itís too late at that point for the perceived approval or disapproval from others to have an influence on the work.