08/07/2004: "Why Can't I Paint?"music: Elliot Smith (8)
technorati tags: frustrated
All day Friday (at work) I was feeling antsy and like I couldn't wait to get home because I'd have the entire weekend with nothing to do but paint (oh yah, and the dishes)...but last night I can't remember what I did, and I spent the majority of today playing around on the site dynamicdrive.com which has a whole bunch of cool scripts written in DHTML. That's how I made the slide show of paintings on this blog as well as the little cursor trail of my two cats, Osiris and Lemoni. Yes, that was a *very* productive use of my time.
And meanwhile, I'm not painting anything. And I want to so much. I don't understand why I can sit here writing about how much I want to paint and yet I know once I post this, I'm not going to start painting. I have this hangup...it happens over and over again. I also feel like I didn't give myself enough time for this next show because a trademark of not working for me is that I get stressed out from not having enough time to work on a show so I keep putting it off. It doesn't make any sense.