02/03/2005: "What I'm *really* afraid of..."
I changed my mind about what I would have painted had I been invited to the "What Are You Afraid Of" show...I would have painting the mast of my sailboat sticking out above the water of the Douglas Harbor!
I just found out today that several boats in local harbors have sunk from too much snow accumulation. My friend Beatrice told me, thinking that of course I have been scooping off the snow all winter, and the fact is, I haven't. Not once this winter. I don't know what the hell I was thinking. We've had huge snow falls in the last month or so, Winter Storm Warnings, Heavy Snow warnings, one big snow dump after another, seemingly endlessly...and I have been bitching and moaning about scooping my driveway...and it never once occured to me that I should be worried about my boat.
I just ran into Dan, an Anthopology professor here on campus who gave me this worried look when I said I hadn't been scooping the snow out of my boat. He's been doing it constantly this winter. His look of concern sent me into a panic. He has offered to help if the boat if full of water and I need help pumping, as I only have a hand powered bilge pump. I'd leave work early and head down there right now only I only have a short lunch break (which I'm on now) before a long afternoon meeting.
I literally feel sick to my stomach right now. Can a person die from having a severe enough panic attack? I hope not. If my boat has sunk, that will be the last straw for me and my bruised and bloodied finances.